How are children affected during divorce and what can be done to support them?

Divorce is rarely straightforward. For couples facing the difficult decision to separate, there are often many practical and emotional issues to work through, particularly when children are involved.

Understandably, many families wish to resolve matters amicably and without the need for court intervention. In fact, mediation is usually encouraged before making any formal court application, providing a safe space to explore solutions together. Where possible, reaching agreements outside of court can help ease tension and reduce the emotional strain on everyone involved, especially children.

When court proceedings do begin, it’s not uncommon for communication between parents to break down further. This can create a more combative atmosphere, often leading to increased stress and anxiety. If there are no concerns around domestic abuse or safeguarding, the court will usually support and encourage parties to explore alternative ways to resolve their differences, in the hope that this reduces the impact on children.

It is important to remember that children are not immune to conflict. In some cases, the focus can unfortunately shift away from their wellbeing, with parents becoming entrenched in disputes. Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division in England and Wales, has spoken out about this. He estimated that around one in five family court cases arise not from safety concerns, but from parents treating relationship breakdowns as legal battles rather than emotional transitions. He noted:

“Parents are fooling themselves if they think children are unaffected.”

This highlights a key concern, divorce is more than a legal process. It is also a deeply personal one. When children witness prolonged conflict, even indirectly, it can affect their sense of stability and emotional wellbeing.

There are signs of progress. Recent data from the Office for National Statistics shows that 80,057 divorces were granted in England and Wales in 2022, a notable decrease from 113,505 in 2021. The Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act, introduced in April 2022, likely played a role. By removing the need to assign blame and allowing for joint applications, the law now supports a more constructive approach to ending a marriage.

We believe in taking care of our clients, of their families, and of the future they want to build. The family justice system plays a vital role in supporting those who need legal protection and structure. But wherever possible, we encourage thoughtful, informed choices before reaching that stage.

If you are going through a separation or divorce and want to understand your options, our Family Law team is here to help. With empathy, clarity and care, we’ll support you in making the decisions that are right for you and your children.